Many couples choose to do all three, depending on their financial situation.
Nigerian weddings are normally characterised by lots of colours.
Upon completion of these negotiations, a wedding date is set, with the elders having provided an acceptable percentage of the full dowry. No request is made for it, but the young man is expected to remember to finish his payment and failure to do so spells dishonor for that family.
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The Wedding procedure starts with the groom's side sending elders (Shimagle) who then request a union between the parties.
The elders discuss a dowry (ጧሎሽ) and verify that the intended bride and groom are not relatives by checking their lineage a minimum of seven generations.
The groomsmen have to either serenade or bribe their way into the house so that the groom can take the bride with him.
Additionally, the best man holds perfume and sprays it everywhere inside the bride's family house.
Customarily, marriage proceedings often begin with the man proposing to the woman.
Upon her acceptance the man then calls for a meeting with his clan elders who largely consist of extended elderly family members.
This is typically the conclusion the first day of a typical Ethiopian wedding.
During the mels/i ceremony is dependent on the ethnic heritage of the family but it is typically smaller than the first ceremony and a time for close friends and family to spend some time with each other and continue to celebrate the newly married couple.
In traditional weddings, customs vary slightly from one part of Nigeria to the other.
In Western parts it is called the engagement ceremony.
Various goods may be asked of the groom and he willingly obliges to the demands after which he is let into the compound.